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Crappy weekend?

BethanBethan
edited September 2006 in Chit chat
I went away this weekend, I had to stay with friends in the 'country' and was distressed when I found that during a picnic in a field, I'd put my hand in sheep poo.

Got back to work today and my manager told me she was embarrased when she had to call a plumber to deal with a blocked loo and she hadn't had chance to remove her poo from the loo.

Did anyone else have any upsetting poo related incidents this weekend?
Post edited by Bethan on

Comments

  • milemile
    edited August 2006
    i didnt have a poo all weekend.

    had one this morning and it was suprisingly small.
  • misguided_foolmisguided_fool
    edited August 2006
    I went back to my hometown on Sunday to see my parents and friends. I didnt plan to go out for the evening, but a mate convinced me. Before I left the house I was in that 'shall I have a poo / shall I not' kinda situation. I left the house without going and all night had a bad stomach. I have the fear of doing a number two in public places, so I had to hold it in all night. I think the amount of cider I drank kinda distracted me and it eased up. I eventually got home about 2.30am and sorted myself out. Suprisingly it only rated about 6 out of 10 on the satisfaction scale. Which was a shock.
  • SardSard
    edited August 2006
    My kids forced me to watch Winnie the Pooh yesterday....I'd have sooner stuck my hand in sheep shit :)
  • mel the bellmel the bell
    edited August 2006
    i just took 2 flushes to flush away an almighty poo
    not too bad, sometimes it takes 3 or more attempts :)
    *feels proud*
    Professional Mel-the-Bell Simulator................"So realistic, I found myself reaching for the Kleenex King-Size!" - Richard Darling
  • CKayCKay
    edited August 2006
    I had a rather impressive one on I think Saturday, wouldn`t flush away at all and I had to use a bucket of water... hadn`t been for about a week and was feeling remarkably unwell :) was gonna post a thread about it then but thought better about it, wish I`d took a picture now, lol
  • mel the bellmel the bell
    edited August 2006
    CKay wrote:
    I had a rather impressive one on I think Saturday, wouldn`t flush away at all and I had to use a bucket of water... hadn`t been for about a week and was feeling remarkably unwell :) was gonna post a thread about it then but thought better about it, wish I`d took a picture now, lol

    damn!!!!!!!
    Professional Mel-the-Bell Simulator................"So realistic, I found myself reaching for the Kleenex King-Size!" - Richard Darling
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited August 2006
    I once did a poo that was so long, that it touched the water before breaking off.

    AND I was standing on the top of the high diving board in the local swimming pool at the time. :)
  • milemile
    edited August 2006
    i hate those massive poo's that make their own way out to sea. you spend ages working it out, then as a proud father you look down to admire your handy work and the bugger has swam off.
  • Bermondsey BobBermondsey Bob
    edited August 2006
    This thread is full of shit :lol: :lol: :lol:

    *runs away*
  • GrazGraz
    edited August 2006
    My poo was so big, I split my bum hole. Very sore, couldnt sit down for a while and is still a bit tender **ow!**
  • BruceNortonBruceNorton
    edited August 2006
    Where I work we have a woman who comes in about once every two weeks, drops her guts and then complains that the toilet is dirty.

    Well I don't know what the f**k she eats but she must have storing up this one for a week. It was so bad you could smell it from at least 20 feet away.

    Sure enough she complained that the toilet was dirty and there was a foul smell, and I got lumbered with cleaning it up(strangley enough I was the only member of staff available)

    So in I went holding my breath, once inside, the smell was even worse(like dead bodies and fried onion) and it took your breath away like cheap moonshine. But in the bowl itself was a big brown bagette floating in what I can only decribe as brown bottom porridge.

    I fought hard but finally vanquished the poo monster and promptly went outside to throw up. Composing myself I went back to the reception area and thanked the woman for reporting such a problem saying that whoever did that need to see a doctor urgently coz there is something seeerrriously wrong with them, at which point she went beetroot red and ran off.
  • DarenDaren
    edited August 2006
    CKay wrote:
    I had a rather impressive one on I think Saturday, wouldn`t flush away at all and I had to use a bucket of water... hadn`t been for about a week and was feeling remarkably unwell :) was gonna post a thread about it then but thought better about it, wish I`d took a picture now, lol

    Aye, www.ratemypoo.com would have welcomed it.
  • Malc74Malc74
    edited August 2006
    chaosmongers wrote:
    I once did a poo that was so long, that it touched the water before breaking off.

    AND I was standing on the top of the high diving board in the local swimming pool at the time. :)

    Why didn't you chop it with your bum cheeks?! :grin:

    [EDIT - I was going to put *runs* here, but that's far too literal for this thread]
  • chop983chop983
    edited August 2006
    My kids and the dog produce it like one of those sausage making machines and the wife is always busy.
  • CKayCKay
    edited August 2006
    Daren wrote:
    Aye, www.ratemypoo.com would have welcomed it.

    Ah Sh*t, I wish I hadn`t clicked that link, haha, I don`t know
    if it`s a random front pagfe image but their was a proper runny yellowy
    horrible abomination that nearly made me chuck (and I ain`t cockly) :)

    I`m too frightened to have another look !
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited September 2006
    When I eat a sausage, 24 hours later, a poo comes out of my bottom.

    However, when I eat a poo, how come a sausage doesn't come out of my bottom?


    (stolen from Viz)

    :)
  • BruceNortonBruceNorton
    edited September 2006
    If you eat poo not only will you get bad breath but you'll also probably get worms.

    And those awful brown bits stuck in your teeth eeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuwww
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited September 2006
    so that's where those bits of sweetcorn come from!
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