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More Weird People in the News...

KleptoKlepto
edited December 2007 in Chit chat
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/manchester/7131532.stm

Now what the heck was this guy actually doing to get himself in this position?
Post edited by Klepto on

Comments

  • beanzbeanz
    edited December 2007
    haha, It must be Manchester. I had an old girlfriend who worked in the ER at Trafford hospital and she had a guy come in with a curtain ring stuck on his John Thomas also.
  • ArjunArjun
    edited December 2007
    Don't miss this ace story right next to the above one:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7132124.stm

    "You failed to appear in the court despite notices sent by a peon and post"
    Judge Sunil Kumar Singh in letter to Lord Ram and Hanuman


    ROTFL!
    Zero - A modern Spectrum emulator for Windows.
    Bytes:Chuntey - Spectrum tech blog.
  • dm_boozefreekdm_boozefreek
    edited December 2007
    Yeah that is funny, but how much would he cack himself if they really turned up?

    I can just see somebody sitting down and composing a letter:

    Dear Kali

    I'd like to know if it really is a good thing to cut out peoples hearts and lower them into pools of lava.

    It would be nice if you would come round to my house so we can discuss it over tea and biscuits.

    Yours sincerely

    Mola Ram
    Every night is curry night!
  • Scottie_ukScottie_uk
    edited December 2007
    Klepto wrote: »
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/manchester/7131532.stm

    Now what the heck was this guy actually doing to get himself in this position?

    As it infurs in the linked document, shagging a peice of metal that he cut of the end of a pipe.

    That remides me, where has Mell been lately. Maybe it was him.
    Calling all ASCII Art Architects Visit the WOS Wall of Text and contribute: https://www.yourworldoftext.com/wos
  • beanzbeanz
    edited December 2007
    Scottie_uk wrote: »
    As it infurs in the linked document, shagging a peice of metal that he cut of the end of a pipe.

    That remides me, where has Mell been lately. Maybe it was him.

    Hmm there is a RING of truth to that thought.
  • XTM of TMGXTM of TMG
    edited December 2007
    beanz wrote: »
    Hmm there is a RING of truth to that thought.

    That name does indeed ring a bell.
  • KleptoKlepto
    edited December 2007
    I can't imagine that would feel very pleasurable. Maybe he has a plumbing fetish. At least he wasn't dressed in a Mario suit.
  • mel the bellmel the bell
    edited December 2007
    *wanks cock furiously*
    Professional Mel-the-Bell Simulator................"So realistic, I found myself reaching for the Kleenex King-Size!" - Richard Darling
  • Scottie_ukScottie_uk
    edited December 2007
    mel the bell wrote: »
    *wanks cock furiously*

    Ah glad to have it back in working order eh!!??
    Calling all ASCII Art Architects Visit the WOS Wall of Text and contribute: https://www.yourworldoftext.com/wos
  • dm_boozefreekdm_boozefreek
    edited December 2007
    There may still be a burning ring around it metal can heat up quite a bit when you're cutting it.


    Don't worry though Mel that ointment was given to you for a reason :p
    Every night is curry night!
  • VampyreVampyre
    edited December 2007
    Bloody hell. That brought memories flooding back of what I think was the first ever episode of Londons Burning on ITV. There's a bit where they are called out to a flat because a guy has got a curtain ring wedged around his nob - to comic effect with the only woman firefighter.

    I distinctly remember it as as a 13 yr old boy who had just found how to, well... you know what.. and making a mental note never to put something around myself that could cause such embarrasment (although they did mention how to reduce the swelling - ice, obviously).
    ZXSR - Speccy Mags Reviews
  • murtcepsmurtceps
    edited December 2007
    dm_boozefreek wrote: »
    There may still be a burning ring around it metal can heat up quite a bit when you're cutting it.


    Don't worry though Mel that ointment was given to you for a reason :p

    I hope he de-burred it as well.
  • mel the bellmel the bell
    edited December 2007
    we use a small sander for deburring :P
    Professional Mel-the-Bell Simulator................"So realistic, I found myself reaching for the Kleenex King-Size!" - Richard Darling
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited December 2007
    That's bizarre...


    I used to be in a punk band called the 'Len Fairclough Experience', and we wrote a song called 'BART' about a person we knew called Simon Kenny, who had got a milk bottle stuck on his cock. The song has some 'in-jokes' that probably not mean anything to most people, but it's fairly funny, if not musically decent!!

    We believe it is a true story, as the story originated from his brother, and he apparently had to go to hospital to get it removed.

    I'll try and get the MP3 song posted up somewhere, ...
  • dm_boozefreekdm_boozefreek
    edited December 2007
    I was in a Hardcore band when I was 17 called "Oaf", we did a tune called "Oaf". Unfortunately it was never recorded and the band split due to musical differences (after about 5 weeks of forming).

    I still remember some of our classics like "I Smoke Tabs", "Fat Bird", and "The Brown Ale Song".

    Happy days
    Every night is curry night!
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited December 2007
    Sounds very similar :)

    I guess the Macc Lads is the nearest thing to it really..

    Our songs were nearly all about people we knew, and getting pissed up. They were all recorded around 1992-1994 when I was about 21 years old so are very childish and drunken.

    Songs include:

    0898 cheap rate
    He's got a dead body at the end of his garden
    Fred West knows best
    Matt the ripper
    Night Out
    Satan made love to my wife
    Gay Stripper
    Nasal Sex
    Haunted House
    Fanny Batter
    Swedish Knicker Sniffer
    Len's Workshop
    Therapy
    Scary Snatch




    I've just put BART on YouTube with lyrics. It'll just sound like a load of noise to most people, as everything was recorded in minutes on a 4-track in a garage. Vocals also go through a distortion unit as well as an analog tape echo (WEM Copycat type thing), so are not easy to work out (so i've put the words down too). :)


    Here's the link..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGJVae45k38
  • murtcepsmurtceps
    edited December 2007
    Is this You ?

    Scarey Snatch
  • chaosmongerschaosmongers
    edited December 2007
    This is the right band, but I quit in 1994. This is a studio recording from after then with a different drummer.
  • dm_boozefreekdm_boozefreek
    edited December 2007
    Bearded Clam Records :lol:

    Fuckin' classic :D
    Every night is curry night!
  • WinstonWinston
    edited December 2007
    Strange fetishes like this are more common than you think...

    I know an ER doctor in Salt Lake City. It's most amusing to hear what they've had to remove from people's rectums! While laughing, I also take careful note so I know what NOT to use as a sex toy.
  • gasmangasman
    edited December 2007
    chaosmongers wrote: »
    Songs include:

    Gay Stripper

    Sung to the tune of a certain Beatles song by any chance? :-)
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