There's a guy at work who NEVER washes his hands no matter what he's done in the toilet, i asked him once but he just shrugged his shoulders and said 'I've never been ill so can't be doing me any harm'. What a tosser.
I also use 1 finger to open the toilet door when leaving, god knows what germs lurk on that door handle.
I think it's more the fact that you know they do it.. then go onto eat soon after etc..
I've decided , I don't dislike 4 sets of my neighbours.. I hate em..
chav's were out last night till 1am shouting in the garden (I'd been at work all day from 7am).. their kids were out knocking the **** out of a fence with football till 9:30pm
the other set who bbq / stink the place out, make sure my clothes are out on the washing line.. don't tell anyone .. then light it up.. if they are stupid enough to today I'll have words.. I called them "bbq a-holes" the other day..
the b**** the other night who thought it was great all the neighbours heard her phonecalls made in the garden at 2am.
I don't need to take an evening class in tamil , as the woman next door screams it daily at her family and they slam windows to a point , I wonder when they will break... and on queue they are roaring at each other.. she even had the cheek to call the noise people out to me.. and I over heard em talk, and they said it was fine.. oddly they didn't do that when there was an extra 5 people living there hhhmmm
they all rent.. most of em are getting it free and don't work for it, what do they care.. housing people who don't listen, should live next to them for a week.. then they might get an insight to the idiots they move in around here.
I don't like the cover versions of popular/chart songs they play in B&Q. I'd rather just shop in silence thanks.
I also dislike those people who park so close to my car in Asda/Tesco, that I can't open the door fully. What is more infuriating is the fact that I whenever possible park at the furthest point from the door, in the middle of a row of 20-30 empty spaces where no one ever parks (sick of people using my car as a doorstop).
It's usually a Honda Jazz/Citroen Picasso/Anything Rover..
I don't like the cover versions of popular/chart songs they play in B&Q. I'd rather just shop in silence thanks.
Sounds like my work radio, which is why I drown it out with my mp3 player.
Nothing more infuriating than hearing 80's songs being covered by the likes of Miley Cyrus, there's 2 different versions of Blue Monday being played on the radio at the min one slow version with some girl singing it, and another one which sounds like it's being covered by somebody like Fallout Boy :evil:
It's even more annoying than the mass slew of techno based 80's covers which have plagued the human race since the turn of the century.
The annoying thing is though they mix a small selection of OK tunes in with the sh*te.
Sounds like my work radio, which is why I drown it out with my mp3 player.
Nothing more infuriating than hearing 80's songs being covered by the likes of Miley Cyrus, there's 2 different versions of Blue Monday being played on the radio at the min one slow version with some girl singing it, and another one which sounds like it's being covered by somebody like Fallout Boy :evil:
It's even more annoying than the mass slew of techno based 80's covers which have plagued the human race since the turn of the century.
The annoying thing is though they mix a small selection of OK tunes in with the sh*te.
Ugh.. All sorts of crap there. I think B&Q is worse though, as it sounds like all the stuff is being done badly by unknown session bands/singers. This is probably down to B&Q being too tight to pay royalities.
Ugg Boots
Women who hold their bags in the crook of their arm
People who interrupt you whilst you are speaking
People who don'y say 'Thank you' when you hold a door open
Driver who don't thank you when you wait for them
People who wear glasses that don,t actually have lenses, just plain glass
Chris Moyles
Will Mellor
Amanda Holden
People on Big Brother
The entire vapid cast of 'The only way is Essex' and 'Made in Chelsea'
Cretinous chavvy specimens who drive about in ****ty old Clios with baked bean tin exhausts
Trendy tossers with shaved heads, fred perry t-shirts that just want to fight every weekend
Members of the EDL and BNP
People who wear Ramones t-shirts without even knowing who they are
People who wear tailored smart shorts
Anybody that goes to the 'V' festival
Fans of 'Bumfun and Sons'
Women who say 'all my friends think I'm crazy.' NO! actually all your friends think you're a TW@
Drivers who drive in the cycle lane
Drivers of 4x4's that have never seen any mud and just use them to pick up Tyroson and Chalene-May
Rude old people that think, just because they are old, they can be rude and push in queues
Sunday Brunch with Tim Lovetoy
Blokes who can't talk about anything else apart from football, subaru's and read nuts magazine
That smarmy scouse, bread making toss-pot off the telly box
Bruce Forsyth or Bruised Foreskin as I like to call him
Pavement cyclists. Especially when there's a frigging cycle lane on the road!
Come the revolution they'll be first up against the wall!
I'm a cyclist (to/from work) and although I will agree with you 99% of the time, there are simply parts of my journey where I think screw it and will use the pavement basically because if I don't my life is at risk.
There are far too many ass-'ole drivers on the road who simply cannot wait three bloody seconds to get to the next set of traffic lights/jam/turning - I've been knocked off three times over the years and every-single-time it's someone not having the patience to wait for me to clear the left turning they want to take and take out my front wheel. Another close shave happened last week in exactly the same circumstances and it was only because I saw the tw@ out of the corner of my eye that I managed to skid into the side of him. He scarpered pretty sharpish as I chucked the bike and backpack to the floor :-)
Or my other favourite where there's no space whatsoever for someone to pass but because I'm on a bike I'm fair game to either knock into a parked car or be shoved onto the pavement.
So yes, I will use the pavement at times (and I will always get off the bike if there are pedestrians around), and you know what, f**k the drivers who don't like it!
Reasons to be miserable, part 641839285209582098
Reasons to be miserable, part 641839285209582098
Reasons to be miserable, part 641839285209582098
Reasons to be miserable, one, two, three, four, five (time passes....) six hundred and forty-one quadrillion, eight hundred and thirty-nine trillion, two hundred and eighty-five billion, two hundred and nine million, five hundred and eighty-two thousand and ninety-seven, six hundred and forty-one quadrillion, eight hundred and thirty-nine trillion, two hundred and eighty-five billion, two hundred and nine million, five hundred and eighty-two thousand and ninety-eight!
I vaguely remember some idiot in a pub in Huddersfield trying to say I was a nazi because I didn't like the band Back to the Planet - needless to say, I hate nazis...
People who ask if I have a "spare fag". Surely there's no such thing?! I smoke them all, I don't buy a pack of cigs and think "oh, don't need those two, those are spares"...
I think you'll find it was a draw today... and who cares if it means we retain the ashes? (Maybe Ian Botham who predicted 10-0 in this series and the away series this Winter in Australia).
People who ask if I have a "spare fag". Surely there's no such thing?! I smoke them all, I don't buy a pack of cigs and think "oh, don't need those two, those are spares"...
This! I gave some skanky little charva a full blown lecture about this when I was about 24. I could see him watching me take my packet out of my pocket pull one out and light it, and he was edging closer, and closer, and closer then the golden quote "Here mate hev yer got a spare shnout like?". I was like "NO!", he was like "Argh! Here mon! Yev got a whole box in yer pocket".
I don't normally go off on charva types because I can't be bothered with the grief or them shouting 50 of their friends over to cause a ruckus, but this time he struck a f**kin' nerve. So I said to him "How do you know it's a whole pack have you got X-ray vision or something?", he's like "Nar! But I seen yer put em' in there", I'm like "That's cos' they're mine! You tend to put your own possessions in your pockets you know!". So after that mouthful he turns and says "Wi alreet mate, but have yer got a spare one?".
I kinda lost it with him then and says to him "There's no such thing as a spare snout kiddo, if you smoke in the first place you're probably addicted to nicotine which means technically there's no such thing as a spare, an addict wants all of what they're addicted to, there's no spares!!!! I then says to him "Do you ask a junky for a spare spoonful of smack?" he's like "Nar!". I then proceeded to ask him if he asks Crackheads for a spare rock? He said no, so then I told him "well then that ought to let you know there's no such thing as a spare snout now f**k off!".
He actually did as well, no high pitched squawking or threatening to get his radgee mate Bazza or his uncle to come n' chin iz, he just said "Alreet mate calm doon!", and walked off looking really put out and confused.
Probably thought I'd just say yeah and hand him a snout to get rid of him......I didn't :lol:
Cyclists who squeeze along the 6" wide gap between you and the kerb to undertake while you're in a queueueue at lights.
Drivers who sit in a daze at traffic lights and only consider thinking about selecting a gear once the vehicle in front has already started moving so only three people get through the lights.
Drivers who give way at random times when it's not helpful at all like stopping to let you turn right before they turn left when the road behind them is clear - then flash their lights and look pissed off when you don't pull in front of them because you have no idea wtf they're playing at. :roll:
People who slow down to half a mile per hour to go over speed bumps.
Drivers who indicate to pull over to the kerb, start to pull over then at the last minute decide to keep going WITHOUT checking that it's safe to do so.
Drivers that pull out in front of you causing you to slam your brakes on and then thank you for letting them go.
All this talk of cyclists made me think of something that annoys me.
Old ladies who go psycho on cyclists for being on the pavement, even if it's a painted off cycle path.
This actually happened to me a few times, and no matter how much you try to explain it's a cycle path, that's why it's got a big f**king painted line and a picture of a bicycle separating it from the path that has the picture of the little walking guy on it.
"You're on the path get off!"
Yes the cycle path you crotchety auld bint! Sod off!".
All this talk of cyclists made me think of something that annoys me.
Old ladies who go psycho on cyclists for being on the pavement, even if it's a painted off cycle path.
This actually happened to me a few times, and no matter how much you try to explain it's a cycle path, that's why it's got a big f**king painted line and a picture of a bicycle separating it from the path that has the picture of the little walking guy on it.
"You're on the path get off!"
Yes the cycle path you crotchety auld bint! Sod off!".
I'm getting an image of Boozy as underwear man from Street Hassle headbutting grannies!
Just generally cyclists on pavements. They're a total menace. It's a pavement, I'm a pedestrian. You're not allowed here.
And when there is one of those stupid cycle lanes, then give me all the space I need. I'm allowed on the cycle lane. Youre not allowed anywhere else. That was the agreement. Slow down and don't moan. Or better still... GET ON THE ROAD, YOU WUSS!
Okay, we've had our moan at cyclists and drivers, how about the worst of the bleedin' lot - pedestrians!
There's a place in Wolves where there must be some sort of stasis field around a pelican crossing that reduces the IQ of any pedestrian by 85%. They will stand there as they should whilst the "man" is on red and at some point an entity takes over their brain that can only be called the suicide entity. They will wait until exactly 0.5s before the main traffic lights turn green (so the "man" is still red) and decide to cross. Actually that place is across the road from where someone decided to leap from the top floor of a Beatties car park, so perhaps it's haunted ;-)
And for all the talk of cyclists being menaces on pavements what about the idiotic pedestrians crossing "normal" roads. I've noticed, especially over the last 5 years since I've been back on the bike, a considerable increase in people simply stepping into the road before even looking. And yes, I am going to take your head off as I'm going past if you do this.
But what makes it worse, somehow this is entirely my fault! A couple of years ago I had someone actually chase after me and basically offer me out. Had I not got some badly bruised ribs I'd have taken the little bastards head off. Only last night the same thing happened again, and it was only this guys girlfriend yanking him back at the last second that saved him from a concussion. Cue the abuse, but this time I stopped and turned around. There's a certain advantage to being 6'3" and built like a brick ****-house, so they had my laughter ringing in their ears as they legged it :-)
Not much point seeing as all the green men have been taken down. There are only a couple of crossings left down here now. It's now a case of, press the button, wait for the traffic to stop, and guess when you have to cross. It's a bloomin dangerous game to play! The new ones not only don't have the coloured men, but they don't make a noise either. Daft.
Dislike people that drive the absolute speed limit, even slowing down when taking a normal wide corner, forcing you and others to drive 10km/h slower than what is optimal for your car engine.
Can't you just be like everyone else, drive a little over the speed limit and everyones happy!??!?!?
Furthermore, they think that because the speedometer reads "80km/h" then they're actually going 80km/h. Speedometers are inaccurate and usually show 10 less or so.
So going 90km/h means you're actually traversing 80km/h.
Usually women drivers are the worst, especially the elderly 60+ drivers that are over cautious, causing hick-ups in traffic!
So step on the gas for f... sake, you old bloody whore b....! :)
I hate that too, but what's far worse is people (usually in Audis or Beemers) driving so far up my arse they can see what I had for breakfast. I deliberately slow right down for these ****ers.
Comments
I also use 1 finger to open the toilet door when leaving, god knows what germs lurk on that door handle.
I've decided , I don't dislike 4 sets of my neighbours.. I hate em..
chav's were out last night till 1am shouting in the garden (I'd been at work all day from 7am).. their kids were out knocking the **** out of a fence with football till 9:30pm
the other set who bbq / stink the place out, make sure my clothes are out on the washing line.. don't tell anyone .. then light it up.. if they are stupid enough to today I'll have words.. I called them "bbq a-holes" the other day..
the b**** the other night who thought it was great all the neighbours heard her phonecalls made in the garden at 2am.
I don't need to take an evening class in tamil , as the woman next door screams it daily at her family and they slam windows to a point , I wonder when they will break... and on queue they are roaring at each other.. she even had the cheek to call the noise people out to me.. and I over heard em talk, and they said it was fine.. oddly they didn't do that when there was an extra 5 people living there hhhmmm
they all rent.. most of em are getting it free and don't work for it, what do they care.. housing people who don't listen, should live next to them for a week.. then they might get an insight to the idiots they move in around here.
I also dislike those people who park so close to my car in Asda/Tesco, that I can't open the door fully. What is more infuriating is the fact that I whenever possible park at the furthest point from the door, in the middle of a row of 20-30 empty spaces where no one ever parks (sick of people using my car as a doorstop).
It's usually a Honda Jazz/Citroen Picasso/Anything Rover..
Sounds like my work radio, which is why I drown it out with my mp3 player.
Nothing more infuriating than hearing 80's songs being covered by the likes of Miley Cyrus, there's 2 different versions of Blue Monday being played on the radio at the min one slow version with some girl singing it, and another one which sounds like it's being covered by somebody like Fallout Boy :evil:
It's even more annoying than the mass slew of techno based 80's covers which have plagued the human race since the turn of the century.
The annoying thing is though they mix a small selection of OK tunes in with the sh*te.
Ugg Boots
Women who hold their bags in the crook of their arm
People who interrupt you whilst you are speaking
People who don'y say 'Thank you' when you hold a door open
Driver who don't thank you when you wait for them
People who wear glasses that don,t actually have lenses, just plain glass
Chris Moyles
Will Mellor
Amanda Holden
People on Big Brother
The entire vapid cast of 'The only way is Essex' and 'Made in Chelsea'
Cretinous chavvy specimens who drive about in ****ty old Clios with baked bean tin exhausts
Trendy tossers with shaved heads, fred perry t-shirts that just want to fight every weekend
Members of the EDL and BNP
People who wear Ramones t-shirts without even knowing who they are
People who wear tailored smart shorts
Anybody that goes to the 'V' festival
Fans of 'Bumfun and Sons'
Women who say 'all my friends think I'm crazy.' NO! actually all your friends think you're a TW@
Drivers who drive in the cycle lane
Drivers of 4x4's that have never seen any mud and just use them to pick up Tyroson and Chalene-May
Rude old people that think, just because they are old, they can be rude and push in queues
Sunday Brunch with Tim Lovetoy
Blokes who can't talk about anything else apart from football, subaru's and read nuts magazine
That smarmy scouse, bread making toss-pot off the telly box
Bruce Forsyth or Bruised Foreskin as I like to call him
That's just for starters!!!
Come the revolution they'll be first up against the wall!
I'm a cyclist (to/from work) and although I will agree with you 99% of the time, there are simply parts of my journey where I think screw it and will use the pavement basically because if I don't my life is at risk.
There are far too many ass-'ole drivers on the road who simply cannot wait three bloody seconds to get to the next set of traffic lights/jam/turning - I've been knocked off three times over the years and every-single-time it's someone not having the patience to wait for me to clear the left turning they want to take and take out my front wheel. Another close shave happened last week in exactly the same circumstances and it was only because I saw the tw@ out of the corner of my eye that I managed to skid into the side of him. He scarpered pretty sharpish as I chucked the bike and backpack to the floor :-)
Or my other favourite where there's no space whatsoever for someone to pass but because I'm on a bike I'm fair game to either knock into a parked car or be shoved onto the pavement.
So yes, I will use the pavement at times (and I will always get off the bike if there are pedestrians around), and you know what, f**k the drivers who don't like it!
It's rapidly becoming a 'Continent of Hate' mate!
Reasons to be miserable, part 641839285209582098
Reasons to be miserable, part 641839285209582098
Reasons to be miserable, one, two, three, four, five (time passes....) six hundred and forty-one quadrillion, eight hundred and thirty-nine trillion, two hundred and eighty-five billion, two hundred and nine million, five hundred and eighty-two thousand and ninety-seven, six hundred and forty-one quadrillion, eight hundred and thirty-nine trillion, two hundred and eighty-five billion, two hundred and nine million, five hundred and eighty-two thousand and ninety-eight!
(drum roll, guitar solo)
? Ian Dury 1979
no, people like you who do that. they are just being polite, not looking for a lesson in sementics. :grin:
This! I gave some skanky little charva a full blown lecture about this when I was about 24. I could see him watching me take my packet out of my pocket pull one out and light it, and he was edging closer, and closer, and closer then the golden quote "Here mate hev yer got a spare shnout like?". I was like "NO!", he was like "Argh! Here mon! Yev got a whole box in yer pocket".
I don't normally go off on charva types because I can't be bothered with the grief or them shouting 50 of their friends over to cause a ruckus, but this time he struck a f**kin' nerve. So I said to him "How do you know it's a whole pack have you got X-ray vision or something?", he's like "Nar! But I seen yer put em' in there", I'm like "That's cos' they're mine! You tend to put your own possessions in your pockets you know!". So after that mouthful he turns and says "Wi alreet mate, but have yer got a spare one?".
I kinda lost it with him then and says to him "There's no such thing as a spare snout kiddo, if you smoke in the first place you're probably addicted to nicotine which means technically there's no such thing as a spare, an addict wants all of what they're addicted to, there's no spares!!!! I then says to him "Do you ask a junky for a spare spoonful of smack?" he's like "Nar!". I then proceeded to ask him if he asks Crackheads for a spare rock? He said no, so then I told him "well then that ought to let you know there's no such thing as a spare snout now f**k off!".
He actually did as well, no high pitched squawking or threatening to get his radgee mate Bazza or his uncle to come n' chin iz, he just said "Alreet mate calm doon!", and walked off looking really put out and confused.
Probably thought I'd just say yeah and hand him a snout to get rid of him......I didn't :lol:
Drivers who sit in a daze at traffic lights and only consider thinking about selecting a gear once the vehicle in front has already started moving so only three people get through the lights.
Drivers who give way at random times when it's not helpful at all like stopping to let you turn right before they turn left when the road behind them is clear - then flash their lights and look pissed off when you don't pull in front of them because you have no idea wtf they're playing at. :roll:
People who slow down to half a mile per hour to go over speed bumps.
Drivers that pull out in front of you causing you to slam your brakes on and then thank you for letting them go.
Cyclists that jump red lights.
At least they're being polite! :grin:
Old ladies who go psycho on cyclists for being on the pavement, even if it's a painted off cycle path.
This actually happened to me a few times, and no matter how much you try to explain it's a cycle path, that's why it's got a big f**king painted line and a picture of a bicycle separating it from the path that has the picture of the little walking guy on it.
"You're on the path get off!"
Yes the cycle path you crotchety auld bint! Sod off!".
I'm getting an image of Boozy as underwear man from Street Hassle headbutting grannies!
im thinking more paper boy. avoiding massive cats then breaking his arm in a construction site he thinks is an obsticle course
And when there is one of those stupid cycle lanes, then give me all the space I need. I'm allowed on the cycle lane. Youre not allowed anywhere else. That was the agreement. Slow down and don't moan. Or better still... GET ON THE ROAD, YOU WUSS!
There's a place in Wolves where there must be some sort of stasis field around a pelican crossing that reduces the IQ of any pedestrian by 85%. They will stand there as they should whilst the "man" is on red and at some point an entity takes over their brain that can only be called the suicide entity. They will wait until exactly 0.5s before the main traffic lights turn green (so the "man" is still red) and decide to cross. Actually that place is across the road from where someone decided to leap from the top floor of a Beatties car park, so perhaps it's haunted ;-)
And for all the talk of cyclists being menaces on pavements what about the idiotic pedestrians crossing "normal" roads. I've noticed, especially over the last 5 years since I've been back on the bike, a considerable increase in people simply stepping into the road before even looking. And yes, I am going to take your head off as I'm going past if you do this.
But what makes it worse, somehow this is entirely my fault! A couple of years ago I had someone actually chase after me and basically offer me out. Had I not got some badly bruised ribs I'd have taken the little bastards head off. Only last night the same thing happened again, and it was only this guys girlfriend yanking him back at the last second that saved him from a concussion. Cue the abuse, but this time I stopped and turned around. There's a certain advantage to being 6'3" and built like a brick ****-house, so they had my laughter ringing in their ears as they legged it :-)
Time to bring back the Green Cross Code Man.
Not much point seeing as all the green men have been taken down. There are only a couple of crossings left down here now. It's now a case of, press the button, wait for the traffic to stop, and guess when you have to cross. It's a bloomin dangerous game to play! The new ones not only don't have the coloured men, but they don't make a noise either. Daft.
Can't you just be like everyone else, drive a little over the speed limit and everyones happy!??!?!?
Furthermore, they think that because the speedometer reads "80km/h" then they're actually going 80km/h. Speedometers are inaccurate and usually show 10 less or so.
So going 90km/h means you're actually traversing 80km/h.
Usually women drivers are the worst, especially the elderly 60+ drivers that are over cautious, causing hick-ups in traffic!
So step on the gas for f... sake, you old bloody whore b....! :)